October is here. Along with pumpkin spice, falling leaves, and the return of glorious, glorious sweater weather, it also means one other thing: Halloween is just around the corner. Halloween can be an incredibly fun time of year — there’s lots of candy and fun costumes virtually everywhere. For those of us who are on the geekier side of things, it becomes an excuse to reuse your awesome cosplay from convention season. For others, it can be an excuse to dress up in their fanciest/sexiest/craziest attire. While most Halloween costumes are all in good fun, some should never be donned again.
Halloween Costumes That Need To Be Retired
Some animals do lend themselves to sexy costumes, like cats or bunnies. Other animals seem a bit weird when sexualized, like giraffes, for example.
Not everything has to be sexy. Candy corn, for example, never needed to be sexy.
Sexy Children’s Show Characters
Want to guarantee that re-watching your old childhood favourites will be awkward af? It’s easy! Just keep your eye out for their sexy costume counterparts on Halloween. It’s the best way to put a whole new spin on old classic lines.
Seriously — they’re scary enough on their own.
We go through this every year, and, still, as inevitable as the return of pumpkin spice, racist costumes show up every fall. There are millions of costumes to choose from — don’t be a jerk when picking out yours.
Trying Too Hard To Cross The Line
You might think that your Kim-Being-Robbed or Blackface costume is “edgy” or “controversial”, but, really, it just makes you look like a dick. Don’t be a dick.
2016 was a crappy year – don’t pick one of its lowest moments to be one of your “sassy” Halloween costumes.
Please. Just. Don’t.
Whatever This Is
I’m not even 100 percent sure what this is trying to be. Baywatch meets 70s porn meets Halloween? Whatever it is, I definitely don’t want it to greet me at any Halloween party.
To be fair, there are some couple’s costumes that are actually clever. The clever ones get a pass. The Halloween costumes that should be permanently banned are those that are just too stupid to stomach for extended periods of time. Bacon and eggs, Adam and Eve, ketchup and mustard, and lock and key — I’m looking at you.