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Dracula Battles Some “Goblin Merchant Men” In This Week’s Adventure

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Dani Strehle

Content Editor

Well, here we are again. Time to sit down and take a bite out of this week’s Dracula. Here is sincerely hoping that this third episode will really set some drama in motion and make this a show I enjoy; as I had originally anticipated. Here we go!

This week’s first scene is a bloody one; but not in the way you may think. Dracula is chained up and is being bitten, whipped and generally abused for reasons as yet unknown. Oh. Well, now his throat has been slit. I believe it is safe to assume that The Order of the Dragon is behind this attack. In what appear to be his last moments, his dead wife manifests herself to him. We flash now to Dracula hanging from a ceiling and inquiring as to why he is still alive.

He is informed that instead of death, the Order condemned him to immortality: the life of a vampire. He then dismantles his chains with his thoughts (I assume) and probably took care of that smug little Order guy right quick. Foreshadowing, perhaps?

Then we fast forward to present day (late 1800s) and see Dracula all civilized playing the piano. We also find out that, because Dracula discovered Lord Laurent’s little secret (having an unmentionable affair with the only son of a powerful English dignitary), he has successfully blackmailed his way into the acquisition of Laurent’s business; he is now officially the “Majority stockholder of British Imperial coolant.” Not sure what the significance of that is yet, but we’ll visit that later, I’m sure.

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Mina rushes to open her door, hoping that it is Harker coming to beg her forgiveness. Instead, she finds Lucy, ready to squire her off somewhere to forget her troubles. Then we shoot to what I assume is an archaic version of a mental institution where we see Lady Jane speaking with a doctor. She is inquiring about two of her relatives that need medical attention. Riiiiight.

Renfield and Harker are wasting no time in solidifying Drac’s place in the business pecking order, now that he’s majority shareholder. Renfield tells the reluctant and rotund man they’re speaking with that, if he refuses to comply with Drac’s wishes, he’s fired. When the man balks at Renfield’s threats, he tells him of Grayson’s (Dracula) acquisition and that he speaks on behalf of Dracula, and has his authority to act fully as his professional liaison.

Renfield has also noticed Harker’s distraction, and tells him that he expects his undivided attention always, and that Grayson wants him to get friendly with a couple of men-about-town to establish beneficial relationships.

Now we shoot over to Van Helsing and the doctor from the asylum talking about some stimulants that Van Helsing knows how to make. After a little probing, the doctor spills that he is seeking Van Helsing’s services on behalf of Lady Jane. Something important is happening here because Van Helsing goes a little white when he hears this. Perhaps stimulants are bad for vampires? Van Helsing goes to relay this message to Dracula; so let’s see what he thinks…

Oh! Okay. No, the stimulants or whatever it was the doctor was looking for were for her seers. The seers are the ones who spotted Grayson as the vampiric threat originally; albeit through the haze of an opium bender. Apparently, they need another drug to help them “see,” and I guess opium, for whatever reason, is no longer a viable option. Dracula instructs Van Helsing to concoct the serum requested of him, and to make it good so that Lady Jane doesn’t stray and seek what she needs elsewhere.

We come back from the commercial break with Dracula sleeping with the enemy. No, literally, she’s naked and snoozing in the bed next to him. While he’s trying to sneak away and GTFO, he hears something that sounds suspiciously similar to the basilisk in The Chamber of Secrets, speaking to Harry in parseltongue through the halls of Hogwarts. But I digress. As he goes in search of the foreign sound, he discovers a secret doorway in Lady Jane’s chamber.

Upon entry, the parseltongue gets louder. He finds himself following a long corridor with lit torches hanging upon the walls. He explores the mysterious underground dwelling to discover Lady Jane’s shackled, vampire prisoner. She begs for Dracula to have mercy and kill her, and he shows her kindness by doing just that. When he catches the first glimpse of Lady Jane peacefully slumbering in her sumptuous bed, the look in his eyes of one of contempt that through a river of tears. Oh, and now they’re having sex. Okay then . Urges, and birds and bees and all that. Moving on.

Photo couresy of NBC Photo courtesy of NBC

Harker is following instructions and befriending some of the men Dracula wanted. He sends over a bottle of wine to the table and the men are noticeably impressed. Harker is a good little lackey, after all! And, more than that, he is looking positively delicious in this episode. I don’t know if it’s because he’s got a bit of a bite to him now, or what; but every time I see him I think he looks better.

Mina and Lucy are getting ready to kick off their shenanigans, but Mina is just not into it. She can’t stop thinking about Jonathon, even though he said such terrible things about her. She resolves herself to go out, get drunk and have a good time. And that is just what she does. Also, Lucy reminds me so much of a blonde Keira Knightly, with a touch of Dianna Agron, that it’s kind of bugging me out.

We head back over to Laurent, where he has just finished a tryst with Daniel. Daniel is imploring him to stay, to come clean, to run away. Laurent tells him it doesn’t matter where they go, The Order will find them, and that they just need to accept that Laurent is about to die and move on.

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Dracula attacks Van Helsing telling him that he will walk in the sun if it’s the last thing he does, and Van Helsing needs to get to stepping to make that happen.

Laurent is now getting ready to answer up to his crimes (selling his shares to Dracula, and without being able to offer an explanation). He is standing in front of the order, of which Daniel is a member. He admits to putting his own benefit above that of The Order, basically signing his own death certificate. Daniel watches as his lover is stabbed through the heart with a ceremonial sword in the most gruesome of ways.

And next we’re onto Lucy and Mina getting ready to down some absinthe. The real kind that will make you hallucinate. Not the stuff you can buy here in the US. I’m kind of expecting them to start some sort of lesbian make out session here, and when Lucy’s face drops after Mina gets up and walks away from her snuggle, I’m convinced that Lucy is actually very much in love with Mina.

Photo courtesy of Sneakpeek.ca Photo courtesy of Sneakpeek.ca

Mina is riding the drug hardcore and having hallucinogenic dreams. She wakes up and starts interacting with some creepy fast talker who wants to get in her pants. Her retort angers and insults him, and he starts to feel a little threatening. As soon as he makes any perceived move against her, he is grabbed by the collar and thrown half-way across the room.  By Dracula, of course.

Drac and Mina are having a chat on the veranda outside, where she thanks him for coming to her rescue. She wonders how he ended up there, since she was kind of slumming it. He tells her he likes the music. She admits that she and Harker have ended it due to the things he said. They’re having a moment when Lucy interrupts them. Lucy’s kind of a cock-block, ya know? Nobody likes a party pooper.

Harker updates Dracula on his lunch dates with the dignitaries yesterday. Dracula redirects the conversation to Harker’s breakup. Dracula tells him that he’s too distraught and that he’s bringing everybody down. Harker starts to spill his guts. He doesn’t understand why Mina wants to pursue her studies when he now has the means to care for her as his proper wife. Apparently, it never even occurred to him that she did because she liked it. Typical man. Dracula tells him he’s a fool. Good for you, Drac!

“How can a man who wishes to defy social convention and rise above his station deny the same thing to the woman he loves?” You can kind of see it on Harker’s face when he realizes Drac is 100% right, and in a moment of resentment he snappily asks if Dracula is calling him a hypocrite. To which Dracula replies, “No Harker. I’m calling you a fool. But you are a man in love. They’re very often the same thing.” Sometimes they bust out really good lines in this show, I tell ya.

Lucy is now looking longingly at a slumbering Mina. She caresses her a little bit and stirs her. Lucy tells Mina that she’s been up thinking about her, when Mina realizes that she has slept straight through her class with Van Helsing. She rushes out to see him and assures him that he is not wasting his time with her. She begs for a second chance and tells her to be there tomorrow bright and early as she will now be acting as her assistant. Van Helsing goes to report to Dracula that the serum for Lady Jane is ready. Dracula talks about plagues on the city and something, and…end scene. This show flashes back and forth so quickly and abruptly I can hardly keep up.

We shoot to the asylum where the serum has been delivered to the doctor. He has a little messenger boy run it over to Lady Jane. Next we witness the seers taking the new drug for the first time. They are tripping hard core looking into this mirror where they see Dracula and Lady Jane getting busy. He locks eyes with the seers and does something that locks their bodies down. Er, no. It was the serum that did this. Van Helsing shows up to ask them if they know what it’s like to lose your wife and children because of disobedience. He tells them that he can’t let them take Dracula down, as he is still of use to him. So it is pretty clear at this point that Van Helsing’s loyalties lie with Van Helsing, and no one else. But, then it kind of looks like Dracula heard him? And Van Helsing is a pretty smart guy. I gotta think that he knew Dracula would be able to hear him there, but who knows? Subterfuge is everywhere.

Photo courtesy of Seriable Photo courtesy of Seriable

Harker has finally shown up to Mina’s house. You were right, I was wrong, blah blah blah. They make up. And then they get engaged, and it really is sweet. They have a really palpable chemistry, actually. And they certainly are a good looking pair. Mina (Jessica De Gouw) is absolutely stunning, and Harker (Oliver Jackson-Cohen) is still looking studlier every time I see him. The whole thing is witnessed by Dracula, who orchestrated the reunion. He is actually helping them out by trying to bring them back together. He tells Renfield that he enjoys the feeling of doing things for others, as he sacrificed his own desires to help Harker fulfill his. Renfield points out that he maybe did that for selfish reasons, as a reunion between Harker and Mina keeps her in Dracula’s life; something Renfield does not believe is wise. Dracula tells him that he’s too smart for his own good, and Renfield agrees. I like how frank they are with each other. It’s rather refreshing.

Dracula is recounting his memories of the first day he awoke as a vampire. He explains that the sunlight burned his skin and, when Renfield asks him what he did, and he said he “ripped out the throat of the bastard priest.” Renfield’s response (brilliant) “So, not a bad morning, all things considered.” Dracula: “I’ve had worse.” Like I said. They bust out some high-quality writing every now and then; it kind of takes me off guard.

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We shoot over to the grotesque corpses of the seers. Lady Jane and some other lead Order guy are discussing the terrible repercussions of this, stating that soon the city will be overrun with vermin. I assume by that thy mean vampires.

We head over to Daniel in his room, staring longingly at a photo of himself with Lord Laurent. We see him fumble for some bullets through a tear soaked haze, and hear, rather than see, him shoot himself. His father hears it and rushes into this bedroom to find his dead body upon the floor. He finds a note on his desk, explaining that he was in love with Lord Laurent, and that Grayson is completely to blame for these tragic turn of events. I guess we can assume Lord Davenport (Daniel’s father, played by Downton Abbey’s Robert Bathurst) will be seeking revenge against the deceitful Grayson.

And that’s that. This week’s episode actually did keep my attention much more than past episodes. It’s a little darker, sexier, edgier. The first two seemed a bit hokey; like they couldn’t decide which way to go with this. This episode felt more focused and coherent.

I’m sticking with it, PopWrappers; and I hope you’ll stick with me as I recap Dracula for the rest of its freshman season. Make sure to voice your opinion in our polls below!

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