Christa Tintelnot

Staff Writer
@ChristaMarie123

Gleeks!  Can you believe we are already on the 16th episode of the season? We only have a few more left!  This week’s episode is called “Tested”, but what does it mean?  We are about to find out…

The episode starts with a weird black-and-white news reel about STDs, with all of the guys dressed as cute little sailors.

Back to reality: Blaine obviously loves NYC, but he seems to be eating his way through it. (Including cronuts). Unfortunately his pants are not feeling the love, and they are now way too small.

Artie is also reflecting on how much he loves NYC, and the ladies of NYC. In fact, he has three girls he is interested in, his favorite being Julie. He appropriately sings “Addicted to Love” by Robert Palmer. He tries to ask Julie out, but she says she doesn’t date people she works with.

The next scene is at NYADA, and Kurt has been working out and is showing off his muscles while Blaine stuffs his face with cheese puffs. Blaine is a little jealous of the attention Kurt is getting.

We then find ourselves with Sam and Mercedes, making out on the couch. Mercedes stops before they get too far and admits that she is a virgin. Sam understands when she says she doesn’t want to go all the way.

We then find the four guys at a restaurant, and Sam says he wants to get an STD test. They decide all four of them should go get tested together. Very quickly in the next scene, we find out that Artie has chlamydia and has to tell the TWO girls he is sleeping with.

When he breaks the news to one of his women, she is not happy. He then talks to the other one, and she casually says she will just go to the free clinic. Meanwhile, Julie, the one he hasn’t slept with, comes up to him and asks him out.

Sam and Mercedes are together at church, and Sam presents his negative STD results.  Mercedes thanks him, but still wants to think about it before they do it. Mercedes starts singing “I Want to Know What Love Is” by Foreigner during the service. (Now, I realize she is making an important decision, but I am not sure church is the most appropriate venue for this song, or the sentiment behind it. However, the song is gorgeous.)

At NYADA, Kurt is showing off his new muscle-y physique. Back at home, Blaine is cooking a heavy dinner of fettuccini and cream sauce, but Kurt suggests maybe a walk and stopping for a salad, instead. Blaine says he knows that he has been putting on a bit of weight. In the midst of the convo, Kurt walks by Blaine’s laptop only to find it open to an adult site. Blaine admits to looking at it, and Kurt walks out.

Next we see Rachel and Mercedes together having girl talk. Mercedes asks what Rachel’s first time was like. Rachel says it was special because she loved hi, and he loved her, and that everything will fall into place.

Kurt and Blaine are just shown in their stage fighting class, and Blaine again says they should talk about the website. They sing the very appropriate “Love is a Battlefield” by Pat Benatar, and the choreography on this is pretty amazing.

Sam and Mercedes are shown eating at the Spotlight Diner, and Artie and Julie walk in. Artie is noticeably nervous about his STD results and fumbles over his words telling Julie they need to wait 7-10 days before having sex. She thinks it’s weird that he would even mention it. Mercedes and Sam, meanwhile, are talking about their big decision. Sam is being totally adorable, and I am almost falling in love with him right here…Mercedes and Artie start singing “Let’s Wait Awhile” by Janet Jackson and the couples eventually meet outside.

After the date, Mercedes and Sam are again talking about sex. She said that she prayed about it, and decided she needs to wait…until she is married. Sam doesn’t quite understand at first, then gets a bit offended, then a little angry. He asks for time to think about what this means for them.

Blaine and Kurt are also talking about their relationship. Blaine feels like he is always falling behind Kurt and that the balance is off. It seems like Blaine feels off because he thinks Kurt doesn’t need him. Blaine starts crying and says he feels insecure, and that’s why he has been looking at adult sites, because they don’t judge him. Kurt says they need to go forward as equals, but Blaine is worried that Kurt is going to wake up and realize he doesn’t love him anymore. Kurt says that will never happen.

Artie and Julie are talking too, and he admits that he has chlamydia. Julie calls him a creeper not only because he got chlamydia, but because of who he might have gotten it from.

Mercedes, meanwhile, is walking down the street when Sam calls her. She walks into her house and sees a bunch of candles lit. At first she thinks it is Blaine, but it is really Sam. He said he also prayed about it and decided that he is OK with them not having sex, and can live without it, but he can’t live without Mercedes.

Supposedly the next day, we see Rachel and Mercedes discussing the sex thing. Rachel admits that there was a moment where she was interested in Sam very briefly, and Mercedes asks her if she is interested in anyone. Rachel says no, and that she isn’t really looking, but will, she isn’t quite ready yet.

Final scene, back at the restaurant with the four guys. Blaine is concocting some type of weight loss drink at the table. Artie shares that he and Julie won’t work out and that he learned a lesson. Sam suggests they make an abstinence club, but of course, no one else agrees.

What did you think Gleeks?  Did you like this one? What was your favorite performance? Let us know in the comments below!

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