We're BACK!! How did we make it a whole week after that premiere?! Episode 2 of Graceland, "Chester Cheeto" finished some major plot points that were left dangling after season 2, and it was EPIC.
The episode started with a groggy Mike Warren sleeping on the couch downstairs, and of course Jakes uses a feather to mess with him to wake him up. Jakes wants to know how to tie a bow tie!
Charlie comes down to the living room dressed up too, and Mike realizes that the DOJ's award for Paige is today. He is immediately reaching for his pain pills, and he admits that he couldn't even try to do the stairs to go to bed (hence the couch-sleeping). He says he IS going to the ceremony for Paige though, and that Johnny can tie a bow tie.... but wait, Johnny is still secretly off with Sid?!
Briggs is wearing a suit and tie?! What? :)
He seems very chipper and when Mike questions him about his positive energy, telling him, "It's a new day, Warren." Charlie and Jakes assume that can't be good... Briggs is definitely up to something!
Johnny's sitting in the pews of a church with Sid, and the priest walks them to the basement, where they are given access to... a secret passage to Mexico?! Holy shit (pun intended).
Paige is honored by the DOJ with a speech about goodness of character and her honorable deeds. Briggs snuck off to the bathroom while at the ceremony and received a gun in a manila envelope from a mystery person in the next stall (so casual haha). This can't be good.
The way the audio of the priest's words and the award presentation speech mixed together with clips of Johnny and Briggs' actions was very well edited and made it much more intense.
Paige is given the award of exceptional heroism, but when she is cued to give a speech, she sees Mike in the audience and stops herself from saying anything. She just takes the award and walks off the stage. Awkward...
Johnny and Sid walked up the tunnel to Mexico and they learn they've walked into a strip club. Perfect. They are supposed to wait there for the money, and Sid seems a bit annoyed that he doesn't have control of the situation.
Charlie and Jakes are picking on Paige for her lack of an acceptance speech, but Paige brushes it off saying it's not a big deal. Jakes leaves to get the car, which gives Charlie a chance to talk with Paige woman-to-woman. Charlie asks her "What do I always say?" and Paige follows with "Bitches get shit done." Perfect. Yes, they do. I need some Charlie-esque pep talks in my life!
Charlie tries to talk Paige out of moving away from Graceland because she'll be the only woman left and the "gender ratio is already way out of whack."
Mike approaches Paige as Charlie takes a call, and he asks Paige to talk with him, but Paige tells him no and walks away.
Charlie's on the phone with someone... and Briggs meets up with her, knowing she's on the phone looking for Germaine. She doesn't want to meet with Amber for information because she doesn't want to have to cut Amber a deal. Briggs may have persuaded her though!
Mikey's counting pills, and Briggs warns him again to be careful and that if he's in that much pain, he should go back to the hospital. Mike is concerned about Briggs and Ari, and Briggs compares dealing with a psychopath to controlling a wave. Right now he's "surfing." Despite the drugs and the pain, Mike's still profiling him, and he wants Briggs to explain the phrase: "It's a new day, Warren."
Mike asks him out-right what he's planning, and Briggs simply says that he's going to kill Ari. There's no cover team so the FBI won't have proof that Briggs killed him. But Mike's not so sure it's a smart plan and warns him that Logan won't let Briggs out it that easily. Logan will still use the tape against Briggs to get what he wants.
Mike's kind of like.. oh please, I know he has the tape. It was in my backpack blah, blah, blah. Can we just be done with the tape already?
...Anyway, Mikey seems to be on board with helping Briggs get out of Logan's twisted arrangement. Briggs is still convinced that killing Ari and dealing with the tape is better than being blamed for tons of felonies he will commit while being with Ari.
Ari is back! Turns out the kidney surgery worked and his uncle is back in the mob business. They come across a fat jogger (random), and Ari is still calling Briggs, "Guy".
Ari knows the jogger! He calls him Chester Cheeto and wants him to sign papers to sell to the Sarkissians. Ari reaches for Chester's ankles and dangles him upside-down over the bridge!
Briggs grabs on to keep him from falling, and Ari actually makes him sign the papers upside-down on the side of the bridge... all three copies. BRIGGS! He dropped him! "You freaking dropped Chester Cheeto off a bridge? It's fine, guy, look! He signed all three!"
But wait... Chester Cheeto is yelling from under the bridge and Ari shrugs it off saying, "He was saved by his fatness."
This comic-violence (is that a thing?) is perfect.
Amber! Charlie is in the interrogation room with her and they are recapping what went down between the two of them last season. Amber tries to scare her, but Charlie hints that there could be a deal, and Amber immediately changes her tone. Charlie tells her that she wants Germaine, and Amber says she knows a dealer in South Florida who works with him.
Logan comes into his office and finds... Mike! Warren doesn't miss a beat and tells Logan that he needs to stop what he's doing with Briggs. Mikey pulls rank and says that Washington will know what's happening if he makes one phone call.
Logan calls him out on failing with a "non-existent arrest record" and yells at him to shut up.
He tells Mike to worry about himself and that he's not important enough to be a threat.
We don't like you, Logan. Go home; you're drunk.
Sid tells Johnny that his deal with Carlito is done, but that Johnny and "his little 21 Jump St. buddies" stole a lot of his money. Johnny knew that Carlito told Sid that he would pay him in one lump sum. Johnny tries to convince him that Carlito won't pay though, and that it would be Carlito just to shoot Sid in the head. What are you planning, John boy?
Johnny makes a deal with him: Sid helps with Lucia and Johnny helps with the money. They watch one of Carlito's men drive up to the club and Johnny cuffs Sid to the door! Johnny "convinces" him (Sid doesn't have a choice) that he needs to go out first and see if there is actually money, because Johnny needs Sid alive to get Lucia.
Turns out there IS money, but Johnny gives it to the strippers! He lies to Sid and tells him that there was no money and only bullets. Johnny also tells Sid that he needs him to go get his money. Dangerous business, Johnny. Don't get your girl killed please...
Mike's still riding the Oxi high (I don't think he's faking the pain though) and Jakes calls him "50 shades of messed up." Mike, who made it up a flight of stairs, is convinced that he needs to be cleared for active duty because he "was sent back for a reason" from death and it wasn't "just to enjoy a state of convalescence."
Jakes picks on him about his "mission from God" talk and warns Mike to be a bit more normal when he sees the doctor to be cleared.
Thank you, Jakes, for being logical and the voice-of-reason around Graceland so far this season!
Mike's showing off some impressive battle scars at the physical, and even though he tries to get another prescription of pain meds, he lies to the doctor about how many pills he has so that he'll be cleared to work in the field.
Back with Ari and Briggs (guy), we learn that Chester Cheeto is a billionaire from computer chips. Trying to get in on the funny, Briggs suggests that Ari call him "Doritos" because it's a "chip." You're so funny, Briggs...
Briggs pulls the gun from his belt and aims it at Ari's back while Ari's going on a rant about weight loss. Briggs imagines shooting him, but he doesn't actually go through with it because he hears a woman yelling for Ari!
We quickly learn that Ari is sleeping with her, but that if her father finds out, Ari will be a dead man... which completely sparks Briggs' interest. Maybe this conflict is a way for Briggs to have Ari killed??
Ari asks Briggs "to take care of her," and Briggs thinks he means kill her, but Ari corrects him -- he just needs someone to help keep her a secret. "It's a lot of work for a piece of ass, but, what a piece of ass!"
Jakes points out that Charlie's using an expensive family dinner to try and convince Paige to stay in Graceland. Charlie gets a call though, and she learns that there's a guy in the Everglades who can tag Germaine. She wants to go down there with Amber. Briggs is NOT happy about Charlie running a long-term drug operation in the swamp with someone who was responsible for having them almost lose the baby once before. He gives her an ultimatum (never do that, man) and tells her to find another way.
Paige is packing?! Nope... put away those boxes. You're not going anywhere.
Mike comes into the room behind her, and without announcing his presence or giving her a chance to kick him out, he goes through the entire story of what actually happened that night when Lina was killed. He says that he still sees Lina in his dreams. She faces away from him throughout his speech and is brought to tears by his words and honesty.
He slowly moves towards her and rests his hand on her shoulder, saying "Don't leave, Paige."
She turns to talk to him and tells him that he's lucky he only sees Lina in his dreams because when he wakes up she's gone. But for Paige, she's never gone from her mind. "This goddamn metal is a constant reminder of what I did wrong."
Mike tells her to let it be a "constant reminder of what you did right."
She is broken down and it's obvious that she still can't forgive herself for her actions, especially with Mike being so open and apologetic about what happened. And the moment we've all been waiting for... she falls into his arms and cries on his shoulder while he holds her. (#pikeforthewin)
Uh oh. Johnny and Sid drive onto the Solano property with the Solano driver duck-taped and tied to the front seat. Johnny finds Lucia on the floor of a shed(?) where she's being held captive and Sid calls him out on not helping him with the money. Lucia explains that they have to kill Carlito before they can leave, because they'll be stopped at the border by his men.
Paige drives Charlie to... not sure yet. Paige is convincing her not to do something. Charlie tells Paige an anecdote about her grandmother working until she was 74, and Charlie explains to Paige that she needs to do what she needs to do in order to keep working as a Federal Agent. Charlie is torn apart by being a mom or an agent, thinking that she needs to make a definitive choice between the two.
She walks into the family center and is filling out paperwork. Is she getting an abortion?
Carlito... oh my goodness. Of course he's in a bubble bath with classical music pulsing through the room. What else would he be doing? Johnny and Sid walk in on him and keep him at gunpoint. Sid tells him to get out of the tub, so Carlito stands up in the water in front of both of them without losing a moment of the "suave." Carlito is surprised to learn that the driver who brought Sid the money "shot at him" (which of course is a lie). Is Carlito trying to turn the two of them against each another?
Sid tells him it's too late anyway and motions for Carlito to walk with them. They go to the family safe (which I'm pretty sure is bigger than my bedroom) but Carlito can't make it THAT easy, right? He pulls a knife out of his robe.
Wait... he keeps a knife in his bathrobe? I'm actually not surprised...
Carlito spins around and stabs Sid in the gut, provoking a fight between him and Sid. They're wrestling on the ground and Johnny hears Lucia screaming for him. She's being pulled into a car by two of Carlito's men. When Johnny looks back into the safe, Sid is trying to stab Carlito in the eye. Johnny pulls his gun and shoots... SID!
It's over! Sid is dead, people! I wasn't expecting Johnny to wind up doing it this season, but there were some clues in the premiere about Johnny wanting to be the one to shoot him I guess.
The freaky Johnny/Solano love triangle continues.
Briggs learned about the abortion by having to pick Charlie up from the family center. He is scared and annoyed, saying that this is the kind of thing he should learn about BEFORE it happens, not after. Charlie tells him to "just cut to the part where you're relieved. You don't have to grow up just yet."
But wait - - Charlie never actually got the procedure done? Oh, this is going to cause some major shit this season. Lying about an abortion so Briggs will let you do the op with Amber?!
Johnny's back at Graceland and hasn't told anyone about Sid yet? Not sure.
Charlie presents Amber with plane tickets at the jail and Amber is in for the op!
Mikey's got two pills left and he pops back both of them.
Paige reflects with her medal, trying to let Mike's words sink in.
And Briggs? Briggs puts on a ski mask and is cruising down the highway. He crashes into another car on purpose and Ari's secret girlfriend is repeatedly screaming "No!" in the front seat! Is he going to abduct her?!!! WHAT?!
-Sid is DEAD
-Johnny is going to have to work with Carlito again to rescue Lucia
-Mikey's out of pills and we still don't know about that creepy notebook
-Jakes is being the best house-dad
-Charlie lied about an abortion to help her get Germaine
-Logan is still a corrupted mess
-Paige maybe won't leave...? Pretty please?
What did you think of the second episode?? Even better than the premiere? Catch you next week, Gracelanders!!