Sharks? Sharks aren’t scary. Squirrels, on the other hand, are terrifying. You may laugh now, but picture getting attacked by a band of rabid, nut-crazy squirrels. It gives me the willies just thinking about all those buck teeth coming at me en masse.
As reported by Bleeding Cool, Squirrels has yet to raise the necessary funds to really get off the ground, but a trailer has been released and a director has signed on (allegedly Ethan Maniquis of Machete), so there is hope for this sure-to-be-classic yet.
With a tagline of “Hold Onto Your Nuts,” Squirrels is sure to be a cinematic masterpiece. The short teaser shows us a little girl walking through the woods with her grandma, having a light-hearted and cheesy good time. They spot the innocuous squirrel chilling on the side of a tree and the little girl goes to feed him a nut. I’m fairly certain you can speculate as to what happens next.
Timur Bekmambetov, who is credited with Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter and Wanted, has been rumored to be raising funds for the project.
The plot synopsis states: “When a young man’s estranged father is killed under suspicious circumstances, he returns home for the first time in years to get to the bottom of the mystery. Hoping to uncover some logical explanation, he instead finds his mom’s sleazy new boyfriend, a natural gas company buying up the town, an angry female sheriff who happens to be his ex-girlfriend, and an army of flesh-eating squirrels hellbent on destroying everything in their path due to an erosion of their food chain as a result of environmental destruction by the gas company.”
Here’s hoping Squirrels can find the backing it needs to grace our television screens.
You can check out the mind-blowing teaser trailer below: