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Movies PopWrapped | Movies

Loudinni Reviews: 'Everest' - Is It Worth The Grueling Journey?

loudinni | PopWrapped Author

loudinni

09/21/2015 7:19 am
PopWrapped | Movies
Loudinni Reviews: 'Everest' - Is It Worth The Grueling Journey? | Everest
Media Courtesy of Credit: fatmovieguy.com

Basically you get to spend the first hour trying to predict who's going to freeze to death in the second.

Not to spoil anything, but the entire Everest cast has only about a 50/50 shot at coming down for Everest 2. As my favorite line of dialogue reveals, "The mountain always gets the last word." That's such a swell title for an opening number, I'll use it if I'm ever involved in the Broadway transfer.

Anybody who's seen 

the preview already knows going in that they're in for a grueling ride. So I guess 

the questions should be:

A) How grueling?

B) Is it worth the pain?

The answers would be: 

Very and no.

As a matter of full-disclosure, I have an excruciating fear of heights and spent most of the film crossing my legs very, very tightly.

A gaggle of rich, explorer-on-weekends tourists hire a guide to take them up 

Mt Everest. What could go wrong?

It's beautifully done, but after a while you might feel annoyed that 

you're emotionally bleeding for people who each paid $65,000 to climb a mountain, in

 a storm, against advice and odds. It didn't take me long to utter aloud, "Why...are...you...doing...this?!"

By that, I mean the characters AND the actors. This had to be the most miserable craft-services table you could ever imagine. This is a lot of work.

Especially for leading actor, protagonist, and alleged Australian (Jason Clarke) who, by the way, has appeared in 

eleven movies in the last three years! Frankly. ELEVEN. And in that time we've seen

him fight for his life with Terminators, talking apes, Leo DiCaprio and now Mt 

Everest.

Not to mention bootlegging with Shia LeBeouf. That's quite a run of monsters dude, calm down. Really. Perhaps a Woody Allen movie next or something?

Excellent cameos in unusually bad wigs are 

provided by Robin Wright and Keira Knightley, who each portray worried, homebound wives, smart enough to skip this particular vacation.

They're both 

excellent; in fact, the whole cast is very good as are all of the production 

values and direction. First rate. And kudos to Jake Gyllenhaal for finding a way to insert and 

display his fabulous torso while catching up on some sunbathing at freezing altitude. Well done, boy. But I'm afraid that, once again, Jake has gone to an extraordinary amount of effort to be in a movie that's probably not going to be a hit.

But it's good enough to catch at home with a fuzzy robe and a warm beverage.

(Loudinni specializes in one-minute-read reviews sans spoilers.)


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