This week on Jane the Virgin, it may be time for those of us on #TeamRaf to go ahead and accept the fact that our OTP may never be. It looks pretty likely that Jane and Michael will be going through with the wedding, effectively tearing all of our hearts to shreds. Let's just rip the bandaid off, shall we?
This week's flashback focuses on Mother's Day, Jane's first Mother's Day, in fact. When she was a baby, a tradition was born between Xo and Abuela, in which Mother's Day consists of nothing but watching telenovelas in their pajamas while eating ice cream. Jane's preparing for the yearly affair when a card is slipped under her door. Petra has invited Jane and her family to a Mother's Day brunch so that Raf won't have to split his time.
Jane, despite the violent gyrating and headshakes from Xo and Abuela, accepts Petra's invitation in the spirit of family and peace.
Rogelio and his nemesis are having a sword fight (no, not a literal one, yes you know what I mean).
Jane is doing some work when Xo comes in and tells her that her phone has been blowing up. Turns out, there are a dozen messages of college kids just begging for her to write their term papers.
Of course, her adviser discovers this and calls her in for a meeting. The prof she thought was going to be her ally actually turns out to be her adversary, while her romance-loving professor actually becomes a surprise ally. Professor Blake, however, does not buy Jane's story about not posting the ad, and tells her that he cannot allow her to come back, because drama just follows her. Jane's adviser does not agree with this decision, and is visibly distraught. Jane won't give up without a fight, though.
Raf and Petra are meeting with Raf's shady brother, Derek. Rafael knows he's shady, though, and is trying to set him up. Raf tells him that they're going to go ahead with the deal, and we know this is just a ruse to keep Derek in town and in his good graces.
Jane did some sleuthing and found the email that created the ad about the essays. She writes to the address and asks if the owner would like to re-post the ad. She gets a response in fractured English that catches her as funny, but she is quickly distracted by Petra moving the brunch back.
She calls Abuela to tell her about the change when Aneska comes in and speaks to Jane in the same fractured English, proving that she is the one who posted the ad.
Jane brings the problem with Aneska to Petra, and Petra tells Jane she will talk to her in an effort to get her TA job back.
Rogelio asks Dina why she didn't invite him to her birthday party, and she tells him that she doesn't think he will get along with her friends. He assures her that he can be classy and intellectual and asks Jane for help in helping him, you know, find those qualities within himself.
Petra confronts Aneska about Jane's ad, and when Petra expresses her distaste for the act and her friendship with Jane, Aneska mutters under her breath that Jane is no friend of hers, since she called her a bad mother. Petra insists Aneska tell her what Jane said, and I have a feeling the brunch/lunch is about to be cancelled.
Derek is in Rafael's office and tells him that he has to resign so that he can run the new hotel Rafael is investing in. Rafael scoffs at this, not immediately realizing what is happening, but Derek tells him that Raf is going to sell him the Fairwick property for one dollar, or he will go to the Feds and turn Raf in for insider trading. Raf is pissed that Derek had him set up, but Derek tells him it's payback for having the police spy on him while acting like a caring older brother.
Uh-oh. Petra is gonna be PISSED.
Jane comes in to Raf's office to drop Mateo off and she can tell that he is very upset. They have a really cute moment, and just, WHHHHHHHHHHHHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Jane. And. Raf. Belong. To. Gether. Seriously. Seriously! I'm not wrong here, am I? I really don't think I am.
Rogelio and Esteban are now having a LITERAL sword fight. Well, a made-for-TV sword fight, anyway. Michael gives Rogelio a pointer about how to actually disarm someone, and when Michael actually uses the move on Esteban, he swiftly takes him down. After this display, Rogelio promotes Michael to technical adviser, and tells him that he will now be in charge of ensuring that all of their fight scenes are portrayed accurately.
Michael goes home to brush up on Medieval warfare while Jane gets a call from Petra, who is asking her if she said she didn't know her own kids' nap times and is a bad mother. Petra's pissed, and Jane stammers, because she knows she's caught. She tries to apologize, but just ends up pissing Petra off more, so she snaps at Jane that she believes Aneska didn't post that ad, shutting down any hope that Jane had a getting her spot back. Yikes.
Jane yells at Aneska that she is a liar and makes her cry in the middle of the kitchen. Neither Jane nor Petra will cancel Mother's Day lunch, though, so it's come to a battle of wills.
Michael has taken his duties a bit too seriously and keeps cutting the take to redirect the fight scenes. Rogelio tells him he needs to knock it off.
Rogelio heads to the party with Dina's friends and realizes that it's actually a sit-down dinner. He begs Jane to coach him, and she shows up and saves the day.
It's going fairly well, until a terrible auto correct caused Rogelio to praise the Nazis. A Jewish man at the table is outraged and spills his wine all over Jane and her phone, making it impossible for her to shoot the correction to the stealthily-texting Ro. He completely blows their cover and Dina realizes that Jane has been feeding him his lines all night long.
Meanwhile, Xiomara has been trying to record her song for Rogelio's show. She's having trouble hitting a note, though, and Esteban comes in and coaches her. She tells him that she isn't with Rogelio anymore, so flirting with her won't get him anywhere, which actually amps the flirting up.
Jane and Rogelio are the cutest, for real.
The family arrive at Petra's Mother's Day lunch, and it is already painfully awkward.
The narrator decided that everyone should drink whenever something awkward happens, so of course everyone is sloshed. As Jane said, this is "the most awkward brunch ever."
She can tell that there is something seriously wrong with Raf, and he finally confesses to the insider trading and everything that is happening and she assures him that everything will be okay. Jane tells Michael about it and, of course, Petra overhears.
Rogelio gathers everyone together to give Jane a video he put together of everyone being recorded telling the camera why they think Jane is such a great mother, and I am bawling along with the rest of the Villanueva women when Jane realizes that Petra is feeling very left out. She's getting ready to do something about it when Aneska steps up and gives a heartfelt speech about how she thinks Petra is a great mother, that has built a beautiful life for her daughters, which is especially impressive since she came from nothing.
It really is touching.
Jane and her family are leaving when Aneska's fractured English sets Jane off again. She starts yelling at her and calling her a liar, but Petra continues to defend her. Jane and Petra continue to fight and it causes Aneska to have an episode that sends her into a fit.
In the hospital, Aneska admits to posting the ad and Jane is livid to discover that Petra has known the whole time. Especially after her professor decides that the confession will not be getting her her job back.
She is telling Xo this and we find that Xo has fallen into bed with Rogelio's nemesis, Esteban. She realizes she has made a terrible mistake, though, and flees.
Petra asks Raf what he was thinking about the insider trading. He tells her he wasn't thinking, he was drunk at the time, and she tells him she doesn't mean what was he thinking about the insider trading, but going to Jane for advice. You ask Jane things about book club and diaper sales, not fraud and federal financial crimes. She tells Raf that he needs to buy them a few days to outsmart Derek, something she knows they can do.
We shoot to Derek on a boat, though, and see him with their mama, Mutter. He's been working with her the whole time.
There are only two episodes left?! How is this possible??? Ugh, I swear to God if this wedding actually happens. What? What will I do?
I'll keep watching just like the rest of the suckers that are utterly addicted to this show.
Until next week!