Tarra Matthews Managing Editor
Okay cool kids, I’m about to take you on an adventure to a place I haven’t been before, a Voice Elimination recap. Be warned I’m not sure what I’m doing here but we will have a fun adventure together. Lets get down to business (after a bunch of filler performances and commercials because that’s what happens, 30 seconds of necessary television becomes an hour)
First off, if I ever see Blake in person, his pointer finger will be less pointy moving forward…
Now we are looking back at last night, now if you watched the show on mute, you’ll have a chance to know how amazing Michelle and Holly did and how meh the rest was.
Why hello Sheryl Crow?! she’s mentoring with Blake remember; I’m kind of a fan so let’s see how this goes. Now I get that she’s got Team Blake with her but she’s letting them sing main parts? Why not just have them singing backup… Unless you can buy this version somewhere? Why tease us with someone we can’t have when we are hearing this song for the first time? Solid performance, nice song and I want one of those chandeliers.
You’ve been warned world, Adam Levine is taking no prisoners! Including Blake Shelton, obviously! Adam totally called Blake out for ‘letting your contestant run wild’ with their song choice. Should be an interesting rest of the reason.
It’s nice that Shakira will take the blame for Sasha getting eliminated but it isn’t her singing up on that stage.
And Usher, complete with self promo, showed his utter love and respect for Michelle. Really hoping she goes far.
And Blake, I feel for you and Oklahama hope people watch your special but I still don’t like your team. But go buy Starbucks today ‘Murrica - I don’t pimp stuff usually but this is for charity!
"Sweet Nothing" Judith & Michelle
At first I was thinking, geez I don’t know this song at all (by title alone) but as soon as it started I was like OHHHHH SEXY LOVIN’! So yeah, mislead lyrics much?? Haha anyway, pairing these two you would think that Michelle would get really overpowered by Judith but they ‘raved’ it out pretty evenly and gave a good performance. Also, is Judith wore THESE KIND of outfits (apparently her hair must remain INSANE) then I could maybe vote for her.
AMERICA SAVES MICHELLE ‘FIRST!?!?! ’ Best news!
"Don’t You Want To Stay?" Sasha & The SWON Brothers
Something sounded off for most of the harmonies in this song, and Sasha screeched her way through most of it.
'MURRICA SAVES DANIELLE (Tarra punches a wall)
I have words for that AGT commercial too, but I’ll keep them to myself. Same with my words about:
"A Thousand Years" by Danielle & Sarah
Why won’t this song go away??? I mean, it will forever SCREAM “I AM THE ULTIMATE LOVE SONG FROM TWILIGHT!” At this generation so please leave it there. The girls look really pretty tonight though, especially Danielle.
Who came up with this Confessional piece?? Sooooooo cheesy
America saves Sasha Allen and I’m pretty sure Shakira almost ate it getting up to party.
"Does He Love You?" Amber & Holly
Oh em geeee I’m so bored guys, make it stop. This pair is so similar they’re pretty much interchangeable, makes for good harmonies though I suppose.
Side note: remember that season of True Blood where there was that witch and when you were under her control your eyes turned all black and creepy? Yeah unfortunately that’s Judith’s eye makeup tonight.
And The SWON brothers are SAFE which means AT LEAST 1 member of Team Adam is OUT *please be Holly*
I like how Carson’s all, ‘I’m the producer, have to tell you how many minutes we have left in the show,” this season. And it always seems that the show threatens to run long. I have a couple suggestions on how to fix it, call me and we will chat Mr. Daly!!
So anyway, final 3 minutes, two dreams to crush, let’s get down to it. Sarah is the only one showing emotion, did we stumble into a pageant?? And why is Holly the only one allowed to talk?? I’m calling favourites!!
AMERICA WHAT ARE YOU DOING YOU SAVED HOLLY??? That’s the wrong choice. And by the sounds of Adam’s declaration of “I hate this country.” He isn’t happy he is losing a member tonight. Too bad they didn’t save the right ones. Shows the power of you country fans out there… ESPECIALLY SINCE YOU PEOPLE SAVED HOLLY TUCKER OVER JUDITH AND SARAH.
Like serious?? This show… Do you think that Judith and Sarah don’t NEED the show or something? Yes I know they are probably two of the most talented people left, and seriously, there should be no surprise here considering the demographics of people voting for this show (well for the most part, you silly people still got rid of all the hottest guys already, but so did Idol, like super fast) this season) but may I suggest next season we have the show done completely is voice overs with dancing cats on the screen or something so it truly IS about The Voice all season?? I mean I wouldn’t care if the person that won was a human Monster High Doll embodiment if they had a killer voice. I’ll see them after they win, I really don’t care.
Anyway now I just want Adam to gather up Sarah and Judith, take them to his top secret Maroon 5 hit making lab, produce their albums and WIPE THE FLOOR with whatever member of Team Blake that ends up winning. Because let’s face it, Michelle should win, and I bet she makes it to the end, but Blake’s going to use his ‘special lattes’ to wrangle enough votes for Holly Tucker or Danielle to win so he can take on Taylor Swift or something nuts.
So just to recap the Top 6: Michelle, Sasha, Danielle, The SWON Brothers, Holly, and Amber. See you next week, if I can get my anger under control…