File this one under KRAZY. Lindsay Lohan’s court drama does not seem that it will ever end. This week, Lohan’s new judge declared Lohan’s new lawyer “incompetent” (translation: he sucks!) and unfit to practice in California (translation: beat it!). What is even crazier is that Lindsay Lohan apparently wants to be a motivational speaker (Wait, what?).
Lohan’s attorney, Mark Heller, is the proverbial pits. He attempted to file a bunch of motions in her reckless driving case not in accordance with state procedure nor in a timely manner (Seriously? Where did you go to Law School?). All his motions were denied (Boo yeah!).
One of the motions he attempted to file was to dismiss the charges against La Lohan because she was not properly mirandized, according to her. This motion was dismissed by Judge James Dabney because it was not filed during her arraignment per California law, not to mention she allegedly lied to the police officers at the scene of the crash before they hauled her off into custody (shame on you!). A weird detail from that motion is that the police spotted a bottle filled with some kind of fluid that looked to be either wine or urine (say it with me now: Ewww!) on the side of the road that had been tossed out of the vehicle (yeah, you’re welcome for that visual).
Another motion that the attorney tried to get passed was to get a delay on La Lohan’s trial so he can have more time to prepare (DENIED), and so that Lindsay could undergo “intensive psychotherapy” sessions and dedicate some time to public service (who is she even trying to kid here?).
Heller tried to explain to the prosecution earlier that Lindsay has had an epiphany of sorts and that she wants to give “inspirational talks at schools and hospitals, in which she will encourage children to pursue positive goals and avoid bad habits” (I thought motivational speakers were people that command respect and admiration, two qualities lacking in Lindsay).
Having a bit of a hard time swallowing that and apparently so is the judge hearing her case. Judge Dabney denied Heller’s request to postpone the trial, saying that what happens in the future won’t “suddenly…change the history of this case” (ooo, burn! Judge 2: Lilo: -10). The judge also slammed her attorney as being unfit to represent her and has charged her with the task of finding someone who is license to practice law in the state of California (Judge Dabney for the win!).
In case you need a reminder, Lohan was charged with misdemeanor counts for reckless driving, providing false information to an officer and willfully resisting, obstructing or delaying an officer. In order for her to avoid going to trial for these charges and for violating her parole, La Lohan will have to serve 90 days at least in a “lockdown rehabilitation facility” (cue the Amy Winehouse hit).
Judging by all this, Lohan might need to stop trying to make fetch, and herself, happen because clearly nothing is working for her. What do you all make of this latest Lilo news? Are you still Team Lohan or are you like this writer and have completely lost all respect and faith on this nothing but trouble starlet (if you can even call her that anymore)?