On last week’s episode of This Is Us, Randall asked Kevin if he ever wondered what life would be like if Jack hadn’t died. This week we find out what Randall’s been imagining all these years. Also this week, we get a stellar performance from Niles Fitch, who plays teenage Randall. 

Alternate Reality Version One

In the first version of the story Randall tells his therapist, Dr. Leigh, everyone is fine after the fire. Randall finds out Rebecca knew about William (Randall’s birth father) and sets out to find him. William welcomes Randall when he shows up at William’s apartment, telling him he was never not wanted and gives him a poetry book. Randall is mad at Rebecca for keeping this from him and spends more time with William than her. He still attends Carnegie Mellon for college but this time he says it’s because he wants to spend more time with William. Randall still marries Beth and Jack and William both attend the wedding and they still have Tess and Annie. At the Pearson Thanksgiving dinner, Randall and Jack notice that Rebecca is having memory issues.

Alternate Reality Version Two

Dr. Leigh gets annoyed and challenges Randall to tell her about what scares him about what would have happened if Jack had lived. In this version of the story, Jack goes back in the house to save the dog. Randall imagines being in the room instead of Rebecca when Jack has his heart attack. He thinks he could have done something. Randall is still mad at Rebecca for not telling him about William but this time William rejects him when Randall shows up at his door. Randall goes to Howard University, it’s Kevin and Sophie’s wedding, not Randall and Beth’s (since they never met), and Randall is a professor and Kevin works with Jack at the real estate firm. Jack calls Randall and invites him home for Thanksgiving and asks him to forgive Rebecca. Jack tells him that Rebecca isn’t well and sometimes forgets where she puts her keys or her phone. Randall goes home and he and Rebecca hug. 

The Present

Back in the therapist’s office, Randall realizes, not on his own, that maybe the problem is that Rebecca spent so many years lying to him about William. It turns out Randall hasn’t quite forgiven her. Randall admits that he needs Dr. Leigh’s help to process Rebecca—her illness and the lie about William. It should be noted that in both of Randall’s alternate realities, Rebecca still has Alzheimer’s. Randall is upset because he couldn’t save either of his fathers but he can try to save his mother. Randall forgives Rebecca but Dr. Leigh suggests that he confront Rebecca. Randall calls Rebecca while she’s at family game night with Kevin, Kate, Toby, and Miguel. Randall begs her to do the trial. He reminds Rebecca that he has been a good son and that he has never asked her for anything. Rebecca looks at the family she doesn’t want to leave behind to do the trial but reluctantly agrees.